best damn thing

crank that

Thursday, January 24, 200810:41 AM

The sight of unmarried couples throwing babies are disgraceful. Make me shed a tear. No, I mean, I was watching something on TV. A commercial and then it shows this couple leaving their new-born baby behind.

Evil. Bagi aku kan bagus. Boleh aku collect banyak2 babies then jual. Dapat hasil sikit. Haha. Naah. Or or or, make a business. Siape2 nak sedut otak baby ke... HAHAHAHA. K. Sorrryyyyyy. Kidding. Totally kidding. I love babies. I hate toddlers.

Syq showed me this video.

Defiant. FAT WHORE. Kurang ajar. Kalau aku mak dier, dah lame aku bukak silat pengatin. Meaning, if I were her mom, I would open a silat wedding. HAHA. Direct translating. Kk. Easy said, if i were her mom, I'd beat the shit out of her till she's mentally retarded. K kidding. I mean, a smack in the head ought to teach the biatch some lesson. Haha. Kidding again.

But, it's really too much.
''How do you feel after hitting your mom?''
''Pretty good''.
Crowds boo-ed. She doesn't deserve to be BOO-ED at people. Tsk tsk. Shame on you. Why don't you just throw her against the wall or something? Or kick her ass or bag her face. No, I'm not being sarcastic here.

She's only 15 goddamnit. FIFTEEN! What is becoming to the world I don't know.

My dry skin is bugging me now. I've been scratching my nose.

Aaaah. Tomorrow I'm meeting the old bag again. And oh, watch this video. AMAZING RACIST. Frigging CUNT. I'd bash this frigging yahudi guy if I ever see him outside man.

For stupidheads who doesn;t understand this video or anything, the Jewish guy is immitating the KKK or Ku Klux Klan. A racist organization which includes being racist towards the black. Yeah, so of course the blacks feel discriminated or anything like that. Haha. Who doesn't siol. The funny part was to listen to them blacks cursing the guy. Hahahahahahahaha. K diam.

Aaah well. Few more hours[exaggerate] to O level results. Tomorrow I mean. All the best to those who deserve to be the best. o.O

Oh, don't mind my blog song. It's alllllllll because of yooouuuuuuuuuuu.

And yes, I miss watching football.

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hag hag hag

Wednesday, January 23, 20083:03 PM

Who the hell do you think I am.
Robot?
Your dog you could push around and tell what to do?

Hag.
I know I'm super younger than you motherFfffff...!
I know I'm able to push you right off the cliff with my pinky finger.
I know you'll go wobbly when I blew you a f-ing wind.

Ya know I'm friggen limping old rag?

Old hag. Nasty, grumpy old woman.

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tamally maak

Tuesday, January 22, 20088:36 AM

You look into my eyes
I go out of my mind
I can't see anything
Cos this love's got me blind
I can't help myself
I can't break the spell
I can't even try

I'm in over my head
You got under my skin
I got no strength at all
In the state that I'm in
And my knees are weak
And my mouth can't speak
Fell too far this time

[Chorus:]
Baby, I'm too lost in you
Caught in you
Lost in everything about you
So deep, I can't sleep
I can't think
I just think about the things that you do (you do)
I'm too lost in you(Too lost in you)

ooh
Well you whispered to me
And I shiver inside
You undo me and move me
In ways undefined
And you're all I see
And you're all I need
Help me baby (help me baby)
Help me baby (help me now)

Cos I'm slipping away
Like the sand to the tide
Falling into your arms
Falling into your eyes
If you get too near
I might disappear
I might lose my mind

[Chorus:]
Baby, I'm too lost in you
Caught in you
Lost in everything about you
So deep, I can't sleepI can't think
I just think about the things that you do (you do)
I'm too lost in you(Too lost in you)

I'm going in crazy in love for you baby
(I can't eat and I can't sleep)
I'm going down like a stone in the sea
Yeah, no one can rescue me
(No one can rescue me)
Oooh, my baby
Oooh, baby, baby

[Chorus:]
Baby, I'm too lost in you
Caught in you
Lost in everything about you
So deep, I can't sleep
I can't think
I just think about the things that you do (you do)
I'm too lost in you

I'm lost in you
I'm lost in you
I'm lost in everything about you
So deep (so deep),
I can't sleep
I can't think
I just think about the things that you do (you do)
I'm too lost in you(Too lost in you)

Awesome song. I mean yeah. From me to you lilhanx

You can't force anyone to be in love. Love is forceless. Love is harmless. It shall always be that way for me.

Oh shut up, Ruzanna. Haha.

Thursday is the day. To determine whether a brand new laptop and PSP be mine or otherwise. Haha. Oh my God. The marked examination scripts are now settled harmlessly across the table. THEY knew our results. THEY knew MINE. Oh, how these measly papers can shed thousands of tears from thousands of people. It's either tears of joy or sorrow. Let's just hope everything goes smooth-sailing for you people, especially ME. Hahaha. Relax, kidding babies.

I need to at least get 20 points or less. Please God the Almighty!!! I wanna get to Millenia Institute. Then, I'll be buying Liverpool FC bag and shoes. HAHAHA. Okay okay. 20 points and above clearly positioned me to a polytechnic WHICH I never ever want to. 20 points and above courses suck. Really. All of them has this engineering thing going on. You don't expect me to take up nursing course do you? The sight of blood makes my head spin.

So people, pray for me alright.

And yes, my new mp3 player just arrived yesterday. Haha. Samsung. The black and slim mp3. Hoooray. I don't have to live with my already-nazak old mp3 player. Hehe.

Geeez, my entries are plain. As plain as Bush's peabrain. Haha. Plain as in no pictures and all. Hmmm.

I miss a lot of people. Especially Juggie who accompanies me whenever Liverpool's match is on. Aah well... nvm.

Hey my sk8er boi, being with you, even heaven feels like hell.
Tamally Maak, sugar.

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Monday, January 21, 20086:38 AM

The only way I would express my jealousy is through cursing under my breath, or mutter some outrageous accent even me myself never heard of them before. As I only want myself to know what I'm feeling. No, not being jealous because she's pretty or she has more than 21 boyfriends, lol, but it's something else. Something that I shan't blog about or being asked about. Do me a favor, no one shall ask me anything about this as I'm the kind that likes to keep things to myself.

Ah, I've noticed many girls wear this LITTLE MISS ____ tops. I thought it'a freaking annoying. Turn left; Little Miss Giggles. Turn right; Litte Miss Splendid. Okay, yeah I know up to you to wear whatever shits you want but it is also up to me to write whatever trash I want down here. Hahaha. I'm just saying how I feel babies.

Even more worst, I'm not trying to diss or harrass fat people. But, even THEY wear LITTLE miss tops. Lol. No, don't get me wrong. I have nothing against fat people. Hey, some of them are pretty too alright.

I never like to have people waiting for me. Never. Because that only leads to giving high hopes. When I tell anyone the truth, they will start sulking and making me feel like as if the whole weight is on my shoulder. I hate that. I depise, abhore and loathe that.

I have many, many irritating friends. So many that even if you pile them all up, you can even beat the mount everest except that I don't have that much friends. Haha. Yaeh, frigging annoying. I don't care if you're fighting with your another friend. No wait. I do care if I feel it's really a surreal crucial problem. But, if it involves shits like whatever you told me, go take a hike 'cause I ain't got no time for this. CHILDISH. I do not entertain juvenile kids. Yes, you're my age. But, you're a 7 year old kid trapped in a 17 year old body.

Sheesh. I'm being so... ____ these days.

Oh hell I miss lil hanx.

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happpyyy

Sunday, January 20, 20082:36 PM

Okay... Okay. I changed my blog skin again. Made a little change to the html and codes.

Went to Yuhua CC today. Collected my bursary. Haha. I stood out in the crowd. I'm the only one with this kind of hair colour and slippers in school uniform in the auditorium. =)

Not much to say but hell, I sure smiled like a monkey just now. Let only PJ and him knows.

I wanna peee. Aku masih perawan. Yay. lol.

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Saturday, January 19, 200810:28 AM

ALAMAK.
Video lags in this blogskin too.
Shyte.

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10:25 AM

I changed my blog skin. Inititally, everything was perfect with blog archives but it went disappeared I don't know why the hell. Checked and re-checked the blog codes and html nothing went wrong. Sheesh.

Decided to change because my previous blog skin, whenever I post videos or something like that, it got lagged and all yeah irritated readers much and me of course.

Ah, went to polyclinic again just now. Appointment stated was 1145. I was there early. I was only allow in at 1215 just because there were more hags down there than yesterday. Sorry to sound so defiant or rude but senior citizens always get the first priority. I know they're old and all but ... Okay, I better keep my opinions to myself. Lol.

But I felt kind of bad after I see these hags went out of the room. Pity them. Nevermind. Aku bagi korang chance. Haha.

It was a different nurse. A Malay nurse. When she opened the dressing, I could see my toe was doing better. Not as much blood as the previous day. So, now my bandaged toe isn't as big as it was. I didnt have to go there tomorrow but Monday. My supervisor called and ask if I could come on Monday. I don't think so because the doctor would so gonna restrict me from work at the moment plus I have an appointment on that day. So, no work on Monday. Sheesh.

After that, mom came to the clinic and we went off to Jurong point. Blah blah and then to Jurong West. I hate Jurong West.

Damn it. I don't quite like your kind of people. Relax... My words are cold and yes I know it might offend you a lil but, take me for who I am. I'm just saying how I feel. I said it and made it sound as harmless as possible and don't tell me you don't feel a slight joking tone in my words.

I'm not quite in a very good mood right now. It is like any time I could swing your head with a hockey stick and then grind your head through a pole. Simply because, some people are just mega annoying. Annoying and stupid. So, if you don't understand what's annoying...

From Wikipedia:
An annoyance is a stimulus that can produce a state of annoyance in a person. It can be in the form of a persistent and mild physical stimulus, a younger/older sibling, a delayed train, an immature friend or the continued hindrance from achieving a goal. Often severe and deliberate annoyance can be caused by somebody in a close vicinity, such as the room next to yours, who is tapping or slapping a desk or fixed object continuously and to various beats.

Effects
Annoyance can cause stress, leading to high blood pressure, and other illnesses.

--------------------------------------

So people, do care, prevent me from getting high blood pressure. Don't irritate me. Haha. Get a life stupids. I hate depressing people. No, not all. Those who are depress BECAUSE

a) The opposite sex are not attracted to you
b) The opposite sex rejected you
c) The opposite sex played around town

Yes, be sad. Please be. But, JANGAN OVER LAH. Annoys me like crazy. Like, one person msn that goes '' Wat shld I do To FoRgEt HiM? :('' MOVE ON LADAAAAYYYY. Let ME tell you what you should do. Seems like he broke up with you because he hates you now. So why bother. WHY BOTHER. HUH HUH HUH ? Ya, love him and all. Uh-huh. I know. But hey lady, you're wasting your time! Plus, how old are ya? 12? 13? GO TO SCHOOL AND PLAY HOCKEY. Okay? Korek telinga sendiri pon belom tahu boleh nak ader matair. Podah.

Unless... He's your husband. He's the guy you're gonna be marrying soon. He's your ___ years boyfriend. He's your fiancee. And, you're a matured teenager not 12 or 13 or 14. Because, believe me, stop effing wasting your time. Go to school and study. GROW OLD A LITTLE then go play dating.

Oh, look who's taking. *Slaps Ruz*. Haha. Nope. See, nowadays, they're only PRIMARY SIX or some even younger already go steady. OmyGod. When I was their age, all I ever think of is go play football under the void deck with guys. Lovey dovey was so out of the leaque.

My first boyfriend was when I'm 15 years old. It didn't work out. I never cry when we broke up. I frigging CRIED because he shoved SHIT and spread them out nicely on my name. Shits as in horrible, horrendous rumours that I'm not gonna tell out here. Oh... In the name of all stars, all I could ever think of that time was to murder him. Because, most people believed his words. That was when people started hating me. Haha. Until now. Eleh, podahlah.

They are all complicated until I found you.

Ooooh, shut up. Haha. Alright2. I won't be 100% evil and mean to depressing people right now but, here's something to perk you up.

Okay dah. Senyom sekarang.

To you, frigging cheer up already. Sorry for my words if I ever did offended you.

I AM COMPLICATED. Maybe I shall just shut up and not promise you anything. Lol. First I say I won't, then I did. Oh Ruz, you deserved to be kicked. Haha. Okay.

A whole long crap post.

New Flyleaf's Cassie acoustic

She had a pretty face
but her head was up in space
She needed to come back down to earth

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fcuks

Friday, January 18, 20082:06 PM

Craaaaap. I went to the polyclinic just now to change the dressing/bandage. Holy cow it frigging hurts so bad that I laughed instead of crying. Really. I'm not kidding you. A very nice Indian nurse, quite pretty, was being nice. She said my tolerance for pain is high because usually her patients won't let her touch their toes. Lol. Oh, I know, I'm strong. =p

We chatted while she changed the dressing. She asked about my contact lenses and said it suits me. Hahahaha. Then, she told me when she was in the States, people thought it was her real eyes because down there they don't really wear lenses and the nurse just nodded to whatever they said. Haha. Funny. And, when I laughed because I was in pain, she laughed along. Haha.

There were 2 other nurses walking back and forth peeping on my toe and their faces went 'ouch!'. Hah. They told me not to look at it. Macam tau aje aku nie takot gore. But, curiousity killed me[not the cat] and so I took a glance on my toe. POW. Disgusting. Blood was flowing profusely and my mental state went bonkers I thought I was gonna die. But I went silent since I remembered the nurse complimented me on my 'brutal' attitude. HAHA. Sshh.

The pain was so excruciating. It was the worst pain I've ever, ever felt in my wholleeee life. I poked needles anywhere but they were nothing compared to this. The nurse did her job which includes: unwrapping the bandage, squeeze my FRIGGING toe, tapped my toe, cleaned the blood, dig dig dig. I admit, I did muttered a lil Ow. Ouch. Yeow. But then I laughed. But then again, there tears welled up my eyes. Lol.

My toe. It was all red. I could see holes in my flesh. I could see FLESH. Woah-ho. Hurraaay. This blog is about dear toe so you better appreciate it you damn toe. Haha.

Oh, some people weren't concerned about my toe [like, I give a FCUK about that]. If you're not concern or anything, just shut up for all I care. Don't come around asking me dumb questions whereas I'M suffering and trying to bear this stupid pain. And there you people are, asking me STUPID OUTRAGEOUS questions.

If you're in my place, you couldn't even last a day you dumbfcuk.

Ya know, after the minor surgery, taking a shower was like mingling around with the devils in a torture chamber. I was warned not to let ANY WATER touch the bandage. Wrapped a plastic around my right foot. Right foot up the sink and I'm balancing my weight on my left leg. Being so cautious not to let water flow in the goddamn plastic bag to my toe.

I walked on my left leg. I'm walking on hind legs. My right leg was limping damnit... Haha. I walk funny. Really. Haha. Even I laughed at myself. Oh, limping gini pon ader orang nak flirt dengan aku. Hahahaha. And, when I had to walk on hills upwards, I had to put all the force and weight on my left leg. Sighs. By the time I reach the peak, I'm already panting like an animal who just got f__ed. HAHAHAHAHA. ssh.

So, tomorrow had to go for another one at polyclinic. Sheesh.

He was a sk8er boi
She said see you later boi
He wasn't good enough for her

P/s: You wanna know more more more about me?
I'm the girl who's kicking the coke machine.
,!, (-.-) ,!,

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popping

Thursday, January 17, 200810:58 AM

Whatchu know bout me

Whatchu whatchu whatchu know bout me

Aisehman, Okay, sorry for not updating. Jangan jadi bloody irritating and bugging me to update my frigging blog. Today was the day. I undergo an operation for my bloody toe. Yeow. First, the doctor injected my toe 3 times to make it numb so I won't feel much pain when he's doing his thang. Quite hurt actually. Like, pinch a lil of your skin and then twist it round and round. It's the same pain. Worse I think. And then, I could feel the scissors cutting my toe nail. And then he scrap2 blood or nail or something on my toe. Haha. The nurse that was with him was so cute. She was like ''breathe in breathe out''. Haha. Then doctor told the nurse that I was quite good because most people already screamed their lungs out. Im cool what. LOL. Kidding.

Then he bandaged my toe. I look so unglamorous. Lol. Kidding again. Who cares. Oh well, the doctor and nurse told me not to go to work because it's frigging hurtful. So he gave me 3 days MC. I wont be working tomorrow and Friday. Shit. I mean, I would be in NUS even if i'm working you know. Ah nvm. Haha. The doctor told me to come back for the first three days so he could change the dressing/bandage.

Mom paid $56/- for the operation and medicine. Sheesh. I thought I heard people whispering ''Ah. That's what you get for playing too much of soccer''. Pfft. Toe has nothing to do with soccer as it has been awhile since I play. So shut up. Just because I'm wearing my sister's long sleeve liverpool jersey [opps. sorry kak. hehe] and shorts doesn't mean I just got back from soccer. LOL. Oh ya, brother said I might as well don't wear shorts. Hahahaha. K shut up.

Okay. My toe hurts already now. Ah well... They told me to make sure water doesn't touch or get in to the wound. SHIT. Aku nak mandi macam mane... Kaki letak atas jamban K.

Oh anyway, last Monday, I had my first day in NUS. Being a sale promoter wasn't so hard. Haha. I sold quite well and I believe the commission I'm gonna get is quite good. Believe me, I was paired up with unknown NUS students. Guys. First, it was me and a guy named Edward or something. LOL. And then me and Darron. They were friendly. Not stuck up. Treat me food and drinks. Lol.

Yesterday was me and Tommy. Very nice to talk to. 3 more months and he'll be graduated from there. HOW F-KING FUN. Hahaha. Oh, the uncle next booth from me told me that he thought I was chinese. And then he asked if I'm mix with JAPANESE. Hahahaha. Chet. Then he said '' Is that your boyfriend?'' He was referring to the NUS guy. Haha. I nearly choked my Milo. He said we're very compatible. Again, I nearly choked my lungs. Hahahaha.

Who says you can only hide scars?

Who says you can only forget about scars?

Who says you can't cure them?

He wanted her

but she never tell

secretly she wanted him as well

BUT all of her friends

stuck up their nose

they had a problem with his baggy clothes.

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pinky

Monday, January 14, 20082:13 PM

Haaaa. Went to sister's workplace to help her out with some stuffs. It was pretty bored there. I switched on the TV and watched this Tamil movie about justice or something. Lol. Hmmm. And then took pictures to fill my boredom with joy. Haha. After all that, sis and me went off to Jurong point. We were famished as f... Haha. So we ordered 2 bee hoon sliced fish soup, popiah, some japanese food and stuffs. Yummeh. We ate like a pig. So, who frigging cares.

And I bought new dress. Pink dress baby.

Adorable isnt it? The dress I mean. Hahaha. Oh and here are the pics with syq.

Craaap. Working tomorrow. Fcuking lazy. I said FCUK not the other way you know. Okay merepek. I hope Im going to NUS so I wont be carrying heavy stuffs.

Bye babies.

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Sunday, January 13, 20082:55 PM

Yay. Aku dah kawin. Yup. Dengan kawan kau punya abang. Haha. Gurau aja dong. Remember that time I mentioned about helping my aunt to be this stupid bride at YUHUA CC? Aaah that one. Aku kena salam menteri siol. Jangan main2. Abeh bangge?

Sister was my make up bride just now. If you ask me to do all the hair and face myself, jangan harap lah. Because I had to wear thick makeups and do my hair. And I dont want thick makeups but sis said 'PENGANTIN MUST WEAR THICK MAKEUP SO THEY WILL LOOK LIKE ONE'. Oh fine. Hahaha.

Oh. I get paid for smiling and shaking people's hand. Oh, also take pictures. The event took place for like less than ten minutes and I earned myself 50 bucks. What a life. I'm going to get new clothes tomorrow. Pergi kerje pakai baju same je.

My sister was told to pretend teaching some kids bahasa jawi. And she gets 100 bucks for that. -.- my task was harder seh! Pretending to smile and be friendly is hard! I should earn more. Lol. Kidding.

I saw ERA last thurs. Shes so sweet. We chatted for while. Were at Macs. She and her bf. Then, i found out she just featured me in friendster. Lol. Sweet.

I miss a lot of people... I miss my angels. And yeah.

Accidentally in love.

And haha. Im chatting with samira saying how my dad and hers can get along so well. If they're friends. LOL.

He was a punk

She did ballet

What more can I say?

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aaaaaaaaahahaha

Saturday, January 12, 200812:37 PM

Aaah. Someone told me to update. Okay. Let's see. Oh, LAST WEDNESDAY, was effing fun. I had a good time with syq angel just messing around and making videos.Will be seeing them at the end of the post. If it's not clear or lag, http://youtube.com/watch?v=I8CSLaDgGR. Haha. Say whatever you want becoz we don't give a f***. And mairek lah, I couldn't upload pics. kk. Next post k.

So, the job really worn me out. On thursday was like a torture chamber lol. Because I was the only one carrying heavy boxes during the first half of the work. Wah, I'm so skinny and me with heavy boxes is not recommended siak. I very strong. Haha. Oh, I made new ez link already. Cost my aunt 15 bucks. The card itself is more expensive then the value. You know? Nvm. Singapore is like this. They raised people's wages and at the same time, they raise prices island-wide. Taxi naek 20 cent. Melampao... Hmmph.

Oh, having to work with Ramizah was effing fun. We laughed and laughed and laughed. I love pushing the trolleys. I even skate with it. Eleh... Eleh... Lagi sikit aku dah nak mampos jatoh.

Today was okay as well. Didnt went home with aunt coz she had to stay late. Apelagi aku nak cakap. I've got so much in my mind right now but it seems to be blank. Oh well, not exactly. ;)

I miss a lot of people.

She had a pretty face
but her head was up in space
she needed to come back
down to eaaartttthhhh

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teardrops on my guitar

Thursday, January 10, 20082:49 PM

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without

Drew talks to me, I laugh cause it's so damn funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
Drew walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?

And there he goes, so perfectly,
The kind of flawless I wish I could be
She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
Drew walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into...

I listened to this at work 98.7 fm and I was like OMG. The lyrics I mean. Sorry, you guys will never get what I mean.

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boi

5:15 AM

The doctor I consulted at Jurong Polyclinic was cute. Not as cute as my aladdinho. Who siol. Don't ask. It's aladdin you know. The Jasmine and Aladdin. I better shut up coz I talk too much.
Dinho because I adore Ronaldhino and Aladdinho sounds cute. K shut up. Syq is coming over. Hurraay.

That's how much I love you (yeah)
That's how much I need you (yeah yeah yeah)

And I can't stand you
Must everything you do make me wanna smile?
And then I like you for a while
No...

But you won't let me
You upset me girl and then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden I forget that I was upset
Can't remember what you did

But I hate it
You know exactly what to do so that I can't stay mad at you for too long
That's wrong but I hate it
You know exactly how to touch
So that I don't wanna fuss and fight no more
Said I despise that I adore you

And I hate how much I love you boy (yeah)
I can't stand how much I need you (I need you)
And I hate how much I love you boy (ohh)
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so (ooh)

And you completely know the power that you have
The only one that makes me laugh
Sad and it's not fair
How you take advantage of the fact that I...
Love you beyond a reason why (whyyy)
And it just ain't right

And I hate how much I love you girl
I can't stand how much I need you (yeah yeah)
And I hate how much I love you girl
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you so

One of these days maybe your magic won't affect me
And your kiss will make me weak
But no one in this world
Knows me the way you know me
So you'll probably always have a spell on me...

It's how much I love you It's how nuch I need you
It's how much I love you (ohh)
It's how much I need you
And I hate that I love you Sooooo
And I hate how much I love you boy
I can't stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you boy
But I just can't let you go
And I hate that I love you soo
And I hate that I love you soo sooo

Jangan perasan okay. I suddenly so into this song. Jangan perasan jangan perasan. Lol . ;)

He was a boy
she was a girl
Can I make it any more obvious?

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fuck

Wednesday, January 9, 20082:11 PM

Today was the worst day I went through hell.

I'm effing mad. First, I was given tons of work to do at my workplace which includes paperwork, sorting of stocks, climbing of chairs, carrying heavy boxes, writing out stocks etc etc. For that I broke my frigging beautiful long NAIL. Motherfather. My toe was aching all the way. I went home slightly pass five from eight in the morning non-stop. Sorry Im not used to working this much. Im always the princess who gets breakfast in bed.

And then, aunt and me waited for the bus to head off to J.E to re-make my ezlink card. The bus was late. Whatever. Then, I was at Jurong Interchange. I went to the ezlink customer service. I lined up already and then the woman said ''sorry we're close''. But I protested because I queued for some time already so I marched forward.

Me: I would like to make a new student pass, please?
Woman: YOU JUST WANT TO MAKE OR U LOST IT AH?
Me: I lost it.
Woman: GIVE ME YOUR IC OR YOUR BIRTH CERTH AND YOUR STUDENT PHOTO NOW
Me: But Im not schooling currently.
Woman: THEN WHY U WANT STUDENT PASS AH?!
Me: Because Im waiting for my O level results and I'll continue study. Thats why.
Woman: Nononononono. IF YOU WANT AH YOU MUST BUY THE ADULT ONE. YOU DONT COME AND TELL ME U WANT STUDENT PASS UNTIL U GET YOUR RESULTS.
Me: But the thing is... I need a f**king student pass.
Woman: YOU WANT YOU BUY ADULT EZLINK 15 DOLLARS!
Me: That's a ripped off!
*aunt whispers and say its okay*
Me: Oh fine, I'll take the adult ez link.
Woman: HELLO GIRL? IM CLOSING ALREADY HOR U WANT U GO UP LAH.
Me: F**KING CB CANNOT SPEAK SLOWLY AH? YALAH2 I GO UP AH BABI.

There you go. I swear upon every twinkling stars that I nearly punch the woman in the nose. She's SUPER rude from the start of our conversation she was screaming all the way. You think I give a damn about how older you are than me? Look at yourself, road whore.

Ended up I didnt re-make my ezlink. And... Unfortunately again, aunt and me took the long route to IMM by bus and I was like oh f... I'm tired and totally worn out and then Im stuck in the bus after a day of chaos. I broke down in the bus. Yes, I cried.

Aah. Aunt and me bought some stuff for herself. And then we ate at Banquet. So, I was still mad. I took out my cellphone and listened to 98.7 fm. And guess what's on air. The silliest stupid wannabe band Paramore. STUPID BAND WITH STUPID IRRITATING SONG. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I reached home. On my way to the toilet, a lipas was peeping from inside a cupboard. As I was angry, you think I give a F about lipas? I could kill a tiger man.

Tomorrow SYQ might be coming over. Hope I'll deal with this ... trash.

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Tuesday, January 8, 200812:11 PM

PIG. PIG. PIG. I LOST MY EZ-LINK CARD AGAIN!!! AAAAH!!! I was at the bus stand on my way back homr from work. I rummaged through my bag and found out that my ezlink lost. I cursed very, very deeply inside. I could feel my face turning into hulk creation. Fed up. Okay, maybe because of my own carelessness but I feel that I dropped my ez link at my workplace. It's either at the canteen or office. PLEASE BE THERE. PLEASE. sighs ...

Work today was fine. But I always felt giddy when I'm at work. Wonder why... And I felt supder duper mega sleepy just now. I swear I feel like punching myself to keep me awake. I was already headbanging with stoned eyes. So people, cursed me mad when you find out I stayed up late to watch football during working days. Thanks.

Oh before I go on, I would midly appreciate if everybody who reads my blog don't ask about the content or anything. Whatever I said, let's just end it here. Thanks again.

Liverpool Vs whats-the-name. Crouch scored. Okay already ah. Skali RIISE bodoh he went and interrupt goalie's catch skali own goal. Wah, aku fed up. K stop.

Ah, anyway, yesterday I went to Tampines to attend the weddding. It was nice though its under the void deck it was pretty grand. The decor was red and white. Buffet dining. Aku apelagi mencekik ah. The bride is pretty. The groom... average. Hmmm, then there was a group of mat motors. -.- what do u people call that? Escort? Ah yelah. Suke hati korang. I hate the noise. So anyway, there was kuda kepang performance and I think they were cute. Alias Kadir was the DJ. I laughed like f man...

After that, mom and me headed towards Bugis. We wanted to go KK hospital to visit Fikri. He was admitted because something was wrong with his stomach. Clinic suspected appendix. Specialist suspected stomach flammable. But he was discharged today. So, anyway, at bugis junction, there was this shoe sale. So, mom and I checked it out for awhile. She knows I dont like wearing heels what more with a toe like this. I was wearing heel then. So she bought for me slippers. Quite nice and cheap. After bugis off to KK. Visited fikri and then off to eat at Al-Azhar.

And then home. I was tired. Totally worn out.

I have pictures i wanna upload. But Im lazy to continue. I wanna watch om shanti om. And oh IM MARRYING KAKA TOMORROW.

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lulu

Sunday, January 6, 20089:22 AM

That's the stuff toy I bought for Nilam. Isn't it cute! Mother is gonna buy one for me tomorrow. Lol. Yay. When to IMM first to buy this stuff toy. Visited Nilam

just now with mom. Woah, she's really in pain. It is sad to see. She had tubes poking through her veins and bladder. But she can talk. Good enough. I hope she's getting well soon. It's funny how I used to abhore her and wished she dies. And still, we are back together again as friends. Sister said that is what true friendship means.

Anyway, since we were in NUH, we visited 2 of father's friend. And then went home. I thought the Malay Exhibition at CC was today were brother and me was supposed to be the bride and groom for the day. It is next week actually. Haha.

Tomorrow I gotta go to my mom's friend's wedding at Tampines. TAMPINES. Oh my... So far. In Kebaya again. Sighs.

MEREPEK SEH AMEK GAMBAR LETAK TANGAN ATAS KEPALE.

Hate my hair. I am so gonna dye them BLONDE and go for a treatment. Tikos said later my hair will be as silky as my ass. Hahaha.

Bye baby.

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unfair

Saturday, January 5, 200812:39 PM

Work was fine. Though I pee-ed a lot of times. Cold and I drank a lot. And its cold now. Wanna know why... Because the bloody fan is directed at me.

So... I'm NOT WORKING TOMORROW. shanananana. shalalalala. Don't have to wake up early. Might be visiting Nilam tomorrow. Hopefully everything was a smooth-sailing for her. Amin.

Let's see. What to talk about. Oh. I dont get it really. What's with the whole world advertisement. They advertised alcoholic drinks like CARLSBERG, HEINEKKEN, NENEKKEN whatever ken there are. But, they restricted from advertising CIGARRETES and CIGARS. They even put gore-y pictures on ciggs boxes. What the hell is this. Based on comparison and further research, ALCHOLIC DRINKS are a lot more HAZARDOUS than ciggs. Im not saying this because im restricted to drink them but its a fact. My late grandpa passed away at the age of 80+. Not because of smoking, old age that is but he smoke a lot. Nothing happened. My sis' friend, he used to drink a lot when he was young, he passed away at the age of 40 plus. His condition was... omg. Doctor had to tape his eyes coz its running yellowish. the whole thing i mean. his body cant function all those stuff etc etc. Critical condition for days. He leave his life on the machine. Once u unplug the wires and all, there goes his life. And thats what the family did i think. Cant bear to see him SUFFER.

Smoking... Hmmm, no no children, i dont encourage u to smoke BUT listen. Its better not to start smoking. Basically, countries who scare their citizens by putting up fake photos of dying throats are STUPID. Wanna know why... coz they drink wine. Stupid knuckleheads.

Living in multi-racial country. WHERES UR BLOODY SENSE OF SENSITIVENESS?

Don't mind me. If u think my blabbering is awful and rubbish, no problem.

Aaaah anyway, look at this video and spot brandon. [Hint: Edge's chin lol. ok i made that obvious]

Haha. Funny and cuteee... The whole thing. Okay.

Syq and me planned to do something like this. Can't wait!

Anyway, Kitty stay strong. I know he loves u alright. =)

[Note: Today's post was... poor-english] Always. Hahahhaa.

Song from Vagetoz. Indonesian band.

Betapa aku mencintaimu
dengan sepenuh hatiku
betapa aku menyayangimu
lebih dari yang kau tahu
syuuu...huuu..ooo..ooo

inginku bahagiakan dirimu
setiap saat bersamaku
seperti janjiku kepadamu
takkan pernah ku ingkari

aku kan slalu ada di dekatmu
aku kan slalu menemani harimu
kau harus tau betapa aku
mencintaimu...

[Ku mencintaimu sedalam dalam hatiku meskipun engkau hanya kekasih gelapku] ='(

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ferrero

Friday, January 4, 200811:38 AM

First day of work. I woke up around 6 plus. Got myself ready and met my aunt under the void deck. She's working at the same place as me. So, reached there around... 8 a.m. First day was okay. Ya I was shy didnt talk much I mean you know. I'm lazy to talk abt work.

Yesterday, went to IMM/Giant with sis and mother. Saw auntie zie, uncle jazz and erin. Qhai's mom is pretty! unclez jazz is cool. erin is adorable.

ok. wait2.

Guess who gave me this flower-like ferrero rocher.! *blush* okay fine i wont hide any longer... there was this OMG KAKA LOOK-A-LIKE approached me when i was on my way back home. he gave that to me plus his handphone number! gosh... i was excited i nearly fainted. his deep romantic eyes. his dark hair. his broad shoulder. his lips. his nose. he resembles kaka alot! and then i realised... i was making this up hahaha. kidding lah. one of my workmate gave me that thing. relax...

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Thursday, January 3, 20086:31 AM

I was bored. Sorry, 2nd entry for today.

When my hair was still silky and shiny. ='(

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3:24 AM

GRRRRRRRRT.

It's only 10:33 in the morning and I'm already awake. Damnit. Okay, I got that job the other day I went for the interview. See, I get something I least expected. They called me just now when I was having my beauty sleep. I picked up the phone and I know I sounded way drowsy and drunk as if I'm having a hangover. They asked me to come today but... see, I'm tired I swear. I need my sleep so I told them I'll come tomorrow. I have to be there at 8. So, I'm working from 8-5 and... Liverpool Vs Wigan thursday morning around 4 plus A.M. if I'm not wrong. And THAT I have to watch. I know what to prioritise. Hahaha. So, I have to turn in early tonight and I swear upon every stars... whoever disturb me, I'll smack them in the head.

8-5 would be 9 hours. Longer than school hours. So, kids who are going to school now, stop moaning.

Okay, I have to admit I'm... JEALOUS to see my friends having boyfriends. I'm jealous yes. There you go I confessed. BUT I don't plan to have any boyfriends. Lol. I wrote the reasons before haven't I? Yeah, thats why. However it does trigger a heartache to see them happy. No, not that I wanna see them FALLING, it's just that they're so happy making me feel like the unhappiest girl on earth which I'M NOT. Pray somewhere down the road, I would meet my Kaka. Maybe after my O level results. To my new school, who knows there would be Kaka's exact replica existance. Don't get me wrong though. I'm NOT SEARCHING FOR A BOYFRIEND. Just know some people and then take things slowly. Be my boyfriend when I finish school, okay? HAHA.

Okay so I'm going to work tomorrow with my aunt. The lady over the phone sounds so dead... so am I. Oh anyway, she told me to wear something simple. Like what? Bikini? Alright kidding. So, it's a cool thang I don't have to wear smart or... intellectual-looking that kind of thing you know.

What if Ryan is still around?

He would be back soon.

He would send me off.

He would fetch me home.

He would wait for me and we'll go to lunch.

= makes me look forward to work everyday.

What am I saying Ruz, you haven't even start working, how bad could it be. Oh, you'll never know.

I just have to type this out.

''When you feel alone ke ape ke, just look at the spaces between ur fingers, remember tht in those spaces u can see my fingers locked with urs forever.''

- Believe me, I still hold on to this phrase

''whenever u feel a warm breeze brush against u,thts the kiss i blew to u.''

''I'VE ALWAYS HAD A DREAM,A DREAM THT SEEMED SO UNREAL AND SO UNIMAGINABLE, I DNT BELIEVE IT WOULD COME TRUE..BY THE GRACE OF GOD, YOU CAME INTO MY LIFE FASTER THAN THE SPEED OF LIGHT,BETTER THN SWEETS FULL OF DELIGHT''

''i love u more and more with each day passing and it eases me to knw as tomorrow approaches, tht i will love u more then yesterday and tomorrow will be more then today. my love for u cant be measured by words alone as love does express my true feelings for u.''

''ure basically all i think about, baby. whatever im thinking abt has to do with u. ure my everything, my existence, my love, my mental status, everything''

I couldn't help myself. I kept on browsing through the email he gave when we were together. How could I forget such a perfect person. He's perfect for me. Just look at those words. We were so far away... a thousand of miles away but he felt so near to me. So close that sometimes I caught myself TALKING into empty spaces. What if we were near. Just blocks away from each other. It would be heaven. He appreciated me. That's one thing guys find it hard to do. He's not afraid to pour his thoughts to me which most guys find it silly to do.

I've known so many kind of guys. When I look at Ryan, SHAME ON YOU GUYS. So near to me yet feels so far away. I feel STUPID to even think of being with guys like you. You know who you are. Sweet talking me into things and then left me just like that. Bravo. Where's ur dick, young man? Coward.

I thank Ryan for showering me with love a guy never did to me before. I never regret knowing him. It has been more than 2 months since he was gone. I'm sorry I couldn't be there by his side before he let out his last breath. I still feel his presence. Not physically but mentally. He's everything that I wanted to be.

I miss you.

='(

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new year

Tuesday, January 1, 200810:36 AM

Phew. What hot day. Just got back home from Carmen's BBQ party at Lakeside, her condo. It was meant for 5As to go and only few turned up plus sad to say it was kinda boring. We didnt know we had to pay. Since we sorta didnt bring extra cash, we didnt eat. But, the good thing was at least I gotta see carmen and all. She showed me around the place. It was cool. So, Nilam and me decided to hop on to Jurong point to have lunch. Haha. By the way, I wonder why I'm not photogenic these days or am I just turning uglier?

In the toilet

Duh, tak nampak tu jamban. Haha.

After lunch, we walked around Jurong point. And then to Jurong Entertainment. Believe me, we have people disturbing us. I wonder why. By the way, I have acne/pimple/whatever [or are they the same thing?] problems! Sucks to the max. But, it's a wonder why my acne or pimple or whatever u call them doesnt appear in pictures. Like, they say it is not obvious actually. But it's my face. I feel sooo uncomfortable. BUT, I never wear thick makeups to cover them up. It is still visible so what's the point. Lol. I'm not hiding my face behind thick makeups like most people do. lalala. Oh, I saw my darling Sasha at Jurong interchange. Haha. We exchange hugs. It was cute the way she asked ''Can I hug you?'' Lol.

Okay. Done with today. Yesterday before going to shisha, we went to Mustafa centre. Believe me, we were like foreigner down there. It's like we're in India. Anyway, father bought some stuff for himself. But, father and me bought SUSPENDERS! HUURRAAAY. Haha. Mine is black. Oh, sister and me wore our liverpool jersey. Okay, is it weird for us to wear that? I mean come on give us a break.

There was this guy wearing Arsenal jersey. When I walked pass he was like ''EH YESTERDAY...'' to his friend. He's trying to brag about Arsenal winning 4-1. Whatever. Haha.

And then went to eat at zam zam. From there, we walked to AL-SHEIKH. Quite a lot of people. We ordered 2 shishas. One orange mint the other one apple mint. Nice. Haha. You guys must be wondering why do we have to go AL-SHEIKH whereas we have our own shisha at home. Kiter punye pasal lah. Haha. It was pretty hard sitting on the ground wearing my adidas skirt. Haha.

On our way back home, there was this caucasians or whites saying ''LIVERPOOL, LIVERPOOL'' and smiling. You can imagine how they say those words. So slang. Hahahaha. I wanted to laugh but I didnt. I wonder if they like or loathe Liverpool. Haha who cares. Mind you, we never wear the jersey for attention.

After that took a train back home. Group of matreps was like ''liverpool ah. maut ah''. Excuse me, I hate that word ''maut ah maut ah''. So shut up.

Okay what else. Oh, its few more hours to 2008. Actually, according to Islam time, magrib is when its considered the next day. So, buat ape aku nak ikot after 12 midnight. Haha. Okay, doesnt matter.

And no, I don't do countdowns. Even if abah allow me to go hang out with friends at vivo or esplanade for countdown, I wouldn't wanna go. I hate crowded places.

So, what's my new year's revolution. Here goes:

1) Go get a job
2) If I were to get into M.I, I'll make sure I study my ass off
3) Lessen down the amount of cursing
4) Control temper
5) Be nice
6) Expert in Guitaring.

Uh... That's all I guess. Pretty lame actually. Nevermind. Well, I just hope 2008 is a better year than 2007. To RUZ-HATER, if your year 2008 happened to just suck, well just consider it as a retribution from yours truly. =)

Oh ya, Michael called and asked if I want this Liverpool so-called scarf his friend bought from LIVERPOOL when he was watching a match there. OMG. Haha. He said if his uncle dont want to then he will pass it to me. Free. But, even if it costs me a few bucks, I would talk to sis about it and Im sure shes gonna buy it. Haha.

By the way, yesterday match was interesting. Liverpool 0 Manchester City 0. Hectic game. Gave us heart attack. Manchester city never attack. Goal attempt was 8-0. Liverpool 8. ATTACK all the way. No doubt manchester city's defender is very good. Its okay Liverpool, you did well. But if only, those 2 defender idiots suck... Hahaha. Man of the match was Torres? Hmmm... Not really. It should be Kewell or Benayoun. Really... My brother in law didnt play well yesterday. Haha.

Okay people. I'm gonna watch OM SHANTI OM music video clips. The songs are nice!

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